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Interlude: ABNA contest

Despite a creativity slump, I've been busy with edits and revisions. Yesterday, I finally got a new short story going: Listener. Meanwhile, I've been occupied with some experiments.

Experiment 1.
Enter the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award--known as ABNA to us "insiders." Goals: More experience with e-publishing, a chance to pick up some reviews from strangers, and publicity (I hope). I entered my 61,000 word YA scifi novel New Vision. The contest requires three parts to the entry: 1. The pitch or jacket teaser, 2. The first 5000 words excerpted from the novel, 3. the complete manuscript.

I'd already rewritten the opening chapters numerous times, and I finally felt reasonably good about the first 5000 words. Nonetheless, I polished and edited the entire MS. That covered #2 and #3. But no matter how many times I redid the pitch, I never liked it. Finally I got something I thought I could live with and posted the pieces to the contest site.  Despite my attempts at formatting the pitch, the result merged online into one massive paragraph. Yeech.

First judging was on the pitch, and somehow I survived the cut from 5000 entries into the group of 1000 going to the next round. It must have been luck or else there's a lot of people writing worse pitches than me.

The next round is with Amazon Expert Reviewers. (Don't ask what this means because I don't know; although I don't know their names, I have no complaints about my two judges.) The Reviewers read my 5000 word excerpt. Here are their unedited comments:
***************************

ABNA Expert Reviewer

What is the strongest aspect of this excerpt?

The alien presence is audacious curiosity at its best.
The biological, Spock-like-melding sense of the alien, was a flat-out fun relity-kick.
 
The drawing of the off-world landscape and the descriptions of the movements through it, physicaly & mentally, by the charcaters, was exceptional.

What aspect needs the most work?

The search for Dreng by Kailin was not convincing enough, in it's descriptions.
He's missing and no clues.
What happened to the reader?
How can, he or she, be so sure?
Obviously, the reader is being left in the dark for reasons.
But lets not be so short, to cut the chase off. 
Instead of a bridge to nowhere, how about a bridge where both the character and the reader are drawing the same ...no clue conclusions/and cut the chase off together.

What is your overall opinion of this excerpt?

This just had me wanting more pages! 
The alien is very well drawn. Kailin is as well. 

This is certainly a winner in my mind's eye. 

Reminded of the classic sci-fi from Hal Clement in the 1949's, From Outer Space, retitiled, Needle. 
In other words, the author's got it, classic talent.



ABNA Expert Reviewer

What is the strongest aspect of this excerpt?

Kailin does her best as a big sister, whether she's protecting, scolding, or going back after, Dreng. That theme is going to carry throughout the book, no matter how strong Henki's character is.

What aspect needs the most work?

Dialogue is believable, adjectives aren't overdone, and punctuation is right - nothing in the excerpt needs work, based on that which is available.

What is your overall opinion of this excerpt?

I wasn't really intrigued by the pitch, but decided, as I read, that I really enjoyed "New Vision." The characters aren't living on any Earth as we know it, and they come across as believable even as they are unfamiliar. Because of the protagonist's age, the audience is widened to include tweens as well as teens.


 *****************************

Aargh, of course, no intrigue to the pitch. I knew that.

Apparently the excerpts are awarded scores that we don't see, but mine were sufficient to get me into the next round, which for YA entrants narrowed the competition from 1000 to 250 participants or 5% of the 5000 who originally entered. So now I'm in the quarter-finals. In the quarter-finals, two reviewers from Publishers Weekly read the entire manuscript. This was what I really wanted, professional reviews. This was why I entered. I told myself that if I got no further than this round, I would get good feedback. Then online, some contestants indicated that the reviews from Publishers Weekly in 2011 had been very brief. Ah so. Ah well.

So about March 20, we hear the next cut down to 50 in the YA category. In that semi-final round, editors from Penguin Books read the manuscripts and select 3 in the YA category (also 3 in the separate adult category). I don't have great expectations because scifi is not a big genre for YA. I don't write about teenagers fighting to the death in a dystopian society, urban fantasy about sparkly vampires and werewolves, schools for magic, or  teenage angst or romance. If I get any further it will be because my protagonist is a gutsy twelve-year-old girl.

But if all I get is a couple of useful paragraphs from Publishers Weekly then I will have met my goal in entering the contest.

More later.

Experiment  2.

Strange Chemistry is a subsidiary of Angry Robots, a speculative publisher. Normally, they take only agented submissions, but April 16-30 they will accept unagented e-submission packets. Because New Vision made the quarter-finals of ABNA, I can't plan on submitting it. Instead, I'm working on a packet for my 91000 word YA fantasy Junak Silver-hand. The packet requires a one sentence summary, a 2 page synopsis, and the first 10,000-15,000 words. I'm happy with the excerpt but continue to sweat the summary and synopsis.  Strange Chemistry is in London, so my hope is that with a six hour time differential, their web submission site goes live by 6:00PM local time on April 15. We'll see.





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